Paenitentia
by Starfire201
Summary: The search for forgiveness can be a long, hard road indeed. And sometimes there are strange meetings along the way. Two-shot, set within Balrog Roike's Redemption Arc in 28 Starscreams. G1
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: **Some time ago, I found a prompt on the TF Random Generator at LJ: _Starscream/Swoop/penance_. It intrigued me, so I took it and saved it, believing I could come up with something for it right away. But I proved to be mistaken, and for the longest time, was stymied. Eventually I just put it aside and went on to other stories. However, I never deleted the prompt from my list, believing that it would be possible for me to come up with something, no matter how slim the chances. After several months, an idea did occur to me. However, the idea was related to a certain story arc being written by another author into one of her stories. I approached said author and asked for her permission to write a story based off of that arc, and it was granted. After many false starts, this story is the result. I would like to thank Balrog Roike for her generous permission in allowing me to write this story based off of her Redemption story arc in "28 Starscreams". There will be a minor reference to a chapter related to that arc within. This story will be a two-shot, and will likely be my only foray into G1.

The title is Latin for "penance".

**Disclaimer: **I am not lucky enough to own Transformers, only this story.

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_"A deed once done cannot be undone...But perhaps it may yet be mitigated!" _- Dinobot _(Beast Wars, Code of Hero)_

* * *

**Paenitentia**

Pain.

That was the first thing Swoop became aware of just after onlining. In an effort to assess how bad the damage was, he attempted to move his wings. The parts and gears ground together, making the pain even worse. A scan showed several of his flight systems were redlining. He was grounded, and worse, with his wings damaged, he could not transform.

The second thing he became aware of occurred when he tried to online his optics. Upon that failing, he ran a scan in that area as well and determined that they had shorted out, likely due to a massive energy surge. Further, the wires appeared to be completely burned out.

Swoop ran several more internal scans, Spark sinking as the results came in: comm systems down; a number of energon leaks, some of them potentially life-threatening; transformation cog cracked…the list went on. With each new result, Swoop's despair increased. He was seriously injured, blinded, and miles from home. By the time anyone arrived to help him, it would be too late.

_Him Ratchet going to be very mad at me. Him Prowl, too._

He sighed, remembering the chain of events leading up to this moment. It had been a lovely day, just right for flying, and he wanted to take advantage of this and go out for a fly. No Decepticon activity had been reported for several days, so it should be safe, he'd figured. Swoop went to Ratchet, and Ratchet approached Prowl and asked for permission on his behalf. Prowl at first was reluctant to grant permission, but when Ratchet pointed out that restless Dinobots could create a lot of havoc, he agreed, on two conditions: First, Swoop had to report in every Terran hour; and second, should he detect any Decepticon activity, he should report it and head back. Swoop agreed to the conditions quickly, willing to agree to anything as long as he got to fly, and headed out.

_I tried to keep them. I really did._

For the first couple of hours, he had followed the condition regarding reporting in, but he was having so much fun on his flight, he hadn't really been paying attention to his long-range sensors, and was unaware of the Seekers up until the moment the first laser hit his wing. He tried to fight back and defend himself, but with three against one, the skirmish's ending was a foregone conclusion. Thundercracker used his sonic attack, knocking him off-balance, and while he was trying to recover, Skywarp teleported in behind him, and grabbed his wings, effectively immobilizing him. The next thing he knew, Starscream was in front of him, a sneer on his face and his null rays pointed directly at Swoop's face.

"Say 'good night', Auto-reject!" were the last words he heard before Starscream fired.

Swoop didn't even remember hitting the ground.

Swoop was so lost in the memories of what happened he missed the sound of soft footsteps approaching. When a hand was laid on his back, he jolted, and started to struggle against the restraint.

"_Don't move."_

The voice was soft, and oddly familiar, yet Swoop couldn't quite place it. All he cared about was the fact he was injured and restrained, and alone with a potential enemy. He struggled harder. He heard a sigh, and the hand lifted.

"_Please listen to me. I swear I am not here to harm you any further. But you are bleeding out, and help will not get to you before you deactivate because of it. All I ask is for you to allow me to stop the bleeding long enough for help to arrive."_

Swoop was suspicious. Who was this stranger? Or was he a stranger? That voice was so familiar…On the other hand, what choice did he have? If he refused, he could very well die (and scans confirmed the stranger's words about the seriousness of his situation). If he accepted, there was always the chance the stranger would kill him anyway. Then it occurred to him that the stranger could have already done so instead of taking the time to ask. That decided him.

"Me Swoop agree, stranger."

Another sigh, and the unknown mech went right to work.

For the next hour or so, the only sounds Swoop heard were panels opening and closing as the mech searched for the worst of the leaks and either clamped or soldered them. As the surgery progressed, Swoop kept an eye on the scans in order to distract himself from the pain. Eventually the levels stabilized and the sounds ceased.

"_I have done all I can. I am going to activate your distress beacon now, and then put you offline to spare you any further pain. I will stay near until your comrades arrive."_

"Thank you, stranger."

Silence.

"_You should not be thanking me."_ The voice was softer, sadder now.

Genuinely puzzled, Swoop asked "Why?"

"_I am merely trying to repair the damage I have done."_

"What you mean? Who are you?"

Another pause.

"_Tell Bluestreak I am aware of his gratitude and am glad he thinks of me fondly even though I am far from deserving of it."_

"But _who are you_?"

A third pause, followed by a resigned sigh.

"_I am sorry I hurt you, Swoop."_

For a moment, Swoop did not understand. But just as the stranger's hand rested on the switch that would throw his processor offline, it hit him. Stunned, he cried, "It's you!"

"_Yes."_ Came the nearly inaudible response. _"Farewell, Swoop, and good luck."_

The switch clicked, and a shocked Swoop slipped into a welcoming darkness.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N**: I broke this into two parts as I felt that the aftermath of the encounter deserved its own chapter. I am hoping this one will answer some questions and will not be a let-down for anyone's expectations. Again, my thanks to Balrog Roike.

**

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**

_Two Earth weeks later_

Swoop stood at the entrance to the Ark, pondering over all that had happened since the incident. He had awakened in the medbay six days following the skirmish. His brothers were surrounding his berth, not allowing anyone except Ratchet and Wheeljack near. The medic released him a few days afterwards, with strict instructions for him to take it easy for the next week. He was lucky to be online, the medic said. Swoop certainly agreed with that one, and gave the medic no argument.

Prowl hadn't been happy, as Swoop had expected. He gave Swoop a stern lecture on following the rules, only ceasing when Swoop stated that his sensors had given no warning prior to the attack. After considering this fact for a moment, Prowl decided that perhaps Skywarp had teleported the Trine on top of him in order to attack him unawares. Certainly it was not the first time an Autobot was caught out by that tactic. However, Prowl said, there would be someone accompanying him from now on in any future excursions, to provide cover as necessary. Swoop willingly accepted this condition.

Prior to his release from the medbay, Swoop was questioned as to who had repaired his main energon lines, for his levels were dangerously low when Ratchet and a few others finally got there and no one else was detected in the area. In fact, the medic said that he should have deactivated before his distress beacon had ever gone off. The delay prior to the distress beacon triggering was further puzzling to them.

In-between the time he awoke and the time he was questioned, Swoop had thought hard about how to answer this inevitable question. He knew the truth was rather unbelievable, but at the same time, lying didn't sit well with him either. In the end, he responded by saying he had been in too much pain to really note who his benefactor was. He knew from the looks on their faces he wasn't really believed, but the matter was dropped silently. It helped that Grimlock was present, effectively discouraging further questioning. Swoop knew his brothers wondered as well, but collectively seemed to have decided that he would speak when he was ready.

_Perhaps one day_, Swoop decided._ But not now. Grimlock has already spoken of going after the Seekers and did not understand when I insisted that he and the other Dinobots not retaliate._

When word of his request got out, none of the other Autobots understood it either, particularly the Twins. Swoop responded to the general disbelief by declaring that he just simply wanted to put it behind him. There were grumbles, but his feelings were generally accepted though he had the feeling some would go after them on principle anyway.

The moment he got the opportunity, he delivered the stranger's message to Bluestreak. The gunner had momentarily been at a loss for words. Then he hugged Swoop and thanked him. The message meant more than he knew, Bluestreak said. He told Swoop the story of what had happened to him at the time Praxus occurred. After finishing his tale, he then asked if Swoop could identify him, becoming slightly downcast when Swoop said he couldn't. Swoop felt guilty on seeing this and quickly added that he was sure the mech was still looking out for them and perhaps one day he'd get to meet him. The wide smile Bluestreak gave him suggested he'd said the right thing.

Even now, two weeks later, Swoop didn't understand why his enemy had assisted him after nearly killing him, but there had been something in his voice, an old sadness. It had the air of someone who had seen too much and truly regretted his actions, which didn't seem to fit with what Swoop knew about him. Plus, the silent approach he'd made didn't seem to fit his profile, either. It was almost as if he was talking to another mech entirely. Or maybe he was talking to...

Suddenly, the air around him seemed to grow colder.

_No, it's impossible...Isn't it?_

Swoop shivered. This line of thought was making him uneasy somehow.

_On second thought, I think it best if I say nothing and go on as if nothing happened. Perhaps one day, I shall tell the truth to Bluestreak as well as my suspicions, explaining to him that I said nothing at the time as I felt it seemed unbelievable. Given his experience, plus the description he gave of the mech, something tells me he would believe me and understand._

Upon making the decision, Swoop pushed himself off the entrance frame, sparing one final thought for the matter.

_Good luck to you, Starscream. May you one day find peace._

Swoop turned around and entered the Ark, stopping only when he felt a hand on his shoulder and heard a soft _"Thank you."_ He whirled back around, but saw nothing. Completely unnerved now, he turned and fled to the room he shared with his brothers, glancing over his shoulder the entire way.

* * *

The Seeker stood in the hall, unseen, observing Swoop flee down the corridor. The moment the pteranodon Dinobot disappeared around the corner, he sighed.

Starscream was fully aware he had taken a great risk confirming his identity to Swoop, but it appeared the Dinobot realized no one would believe him if he did say anything, and besides delivering the message to Bluestreak, had chosen to keep his own counsel.

And yet, so often Starscream wished he _could_ declare his identity. Just as he so often wished he could do something to change or influence the events leading up to the war, but aside from the oh-too rare times where he could solidify himself to aid when he could, he was powerless to do so.

_All I can do is continue as I have been, making sure that events play out as they should._

_Perhaps, if I do this, I will finally be granted forgiveness and allowed to rest._

_I will make things right._

A sad smile appeared on his face.

_Even if it takes an eternity._

* * *

_"Tell my tale to those who ask. Tell it truly, the ill deeds along with the good, and let me be judged accordingly. The rest...is silence..."_ – Dinobot's final words (_Beast Wars, __Code of Hero_)


End file.
